Sunday, 19 July 2015

Words of Wisdom

As some of you may know, I discovered Twitter about six months ago and have become a 'born again' Tweeter. I only wish I'd started using it years ago.  Anyway, one of my Twitter Pals, Fizzy, has a litter of puppies which we older dogs are mentoring.  However, time is passing quickly, they'll soon be in their 'forever homes' and 140 characters isn't very many to communicate years of accumulated wisdom, so I thought I'd expand a bit.  Here's my advice to the youngsters:

  • This might come a bit late, but make sure you choose your new family carefully.  It's easy to do this.  They will have read lots of advice on how to choose a puppy, so if you think they're not for you, just act a bit listless or a bit grumpy and they'll pass you by.  This worked for me, although I was a bit worried I'd been too fussy.  I was the last one in my litter not chosen ('Him Indoors' thinks there might have been a good reason for that...) but when I saw 'Them Indoors' I knew straight away that they were right, climbed onto 'Junior Him's lap and started chewing his trousers, so he knew he'd been picked.
    Making my selection!
    Ruling the roost in the kitchen
  • Make sure that you quickly establish your place in the family pecking order to ensure your needs are given a suitable priority.

  • Remember that you are a dog and don't let them treat you as a person.  Also remember that your job description is 'family pet' and don't let them exploit the 'any other duties' clause.  In particular, don't let them monopolise your terrier instincts for their own advantage.  Any chasing of rabbits, pigeons and squirrels should be strictly on your own terms.
  • Socialising with other dogs is an important thing, but make sure you choose your own friends.  Don't let them foist any old pooch on you, after all, they choose theirs.  Make sure you keep your criteria for who you like and who you don't a closely guarded secret however....
  • I never went to dog training classes as 'Her Indoors' thought she could train me herself (how hard could it be? Just a few basic commands...)  However, I've consulted with dogs who have and there are two suitable responses.  
    • Behave brilliantly, learn all the commands instantly and get an award for being top of the class, then forget it all as soon as you get home and resort to being a little terrorist, or...
    • Behave really badly in class, show your family up, disrupt the learning of other dogs and, the ultimate accolade, get the trainer to suggest that you are brought on your own....
  • If your new family have children, remember that bringing them up is a serious business.  You are responsible for raising the next generation of dog lovers.  You can be a dragon, a noble steed, or a fairy princess with very little trouble. Children and dogs have a lot of common interests so enjoy.
    Playtime with my juniors
  • Having said that, beware of water pistols, footballs, dressing up clothes, and sledges
  •  Remember not to miss any opportunity for sourcing your own food.  Subscribe to the 'eat first, think later' mantra and you'll never miss out on anything vaguely edible.  If it's not edible, and you've consumed it, don't worry, it'll find its own way out and you've always got your family to clear up after you.
  • Don't let on how smart you are, how much you really understand, why you do certain things and how long your memory is.  Best to hide your light under a bushall and keep them guessing.  It makes you interesting. 
  • Be loyal to those you love and bark at those you don't - simple!
    Sharing a moment - me and 'Her Indoors'
  • And most importantly of all, have fun!  If things get a bit quiet and boring, make your own amusement in whatever way seems appropriate to you.  It keeps your family on their toes.
    Having a funny five minutes with my Frisbeee

1 comment:

  1. Very good advice Mr Rolo...i wish i had a mentor like you...