I'm in trouble again and it's not my fault.
The rabbits in the garden are a bit of a preoccupation with me. I can chase them and bark at them, but they're too fast to catch so I have to rely on terrier stealth and cunning. I've tried sitting outside their rabbit hole for long periods of time, waiting hopefully, but they seem to know I'm there, I can't think how. Anyway, the little blighters have learnt that when they get through to the other side of the wire mesh fence, they can flaunt themselves in the safe knowledge that I'm too big to squeeze through. Basil, the dog, next door has his heart in the right place, but he's getting a bit elderly for chasing. This evening I got a bit fed up with all the bunny taunting and tried to climb through the fence to teach them a thing or two. Problem was, my collar got caught up and I got stuck. I could hear 'Her Indoors' calling me back in, but I couldn't move. Fortunately, she came looking for me and had a fair idea where I might be so eventually found me. The trouble is, I was in a particularly inaccessible part of the garden and she's a lot bigger than a Border Terrier. To her credit, she battled through the branches, brambles and stingy nettles, but the language was a bit ripe - not the sort you hear on Radio Four. I learnt a few new words to add to my twenty, I can tell you. She practised some of my alternative names as well, but she did manage to unhook me without resorting to wire clippers. I was sent indoors though. I bet the rabbits are laughing right now, but they want to watch their steps, revenge is a dish best served cold, and cold is what they'll be if I have anything to do with it.