Sunday 5 June 2016

In, Out, Shake it All About!

Now as you will probably know, I'm not really a political animal.  We dogs don't generally reach the age at which voting is allowed, although there has been a Twitter campaign to get dogs into polling stations which I heartily approve of.  That doesn't stop us from listening to the debates and making our own minds up, however, this business about Europe has left me a bit flumoxed.  I know I'm just a dog of limited understanding, but it seems a bit strange to magnanimously offer a choice to the electorate, but then throw the whole weight of government, and the oppostion for that matter, behind one outcome.  Is it just me or doesn't that seem quite democratic?  Anyway, I'm sure the good folks in Scotland will recognise the technique.....

I for one, am in a bit of a dither.  Being part of Europe has brought certain benefits for us dogs.  Take passports for pets.  It used to be that a trip to the continent meant six months in quarantine, which was a significant obsticle for your average holiday-going dog.  Now however, the whole process has been simplified, and with the right vaccinations and paperwork, any pooch can accompany their family 'en vacance'.  The flip side is immigration.  True, some dogs are coming over for work purposes.  Take a look at any major dog show and you'll see cannines from all over Europe strutting their stuff.  I suppose you could argue that we've got plenty of first class pooches of our own and that these foreign dogs are winning our prizes at the expense of native dogs, but I'm usually a friendly chap, unless I don't happen to like the cannine in question, and that has nothing to do with nationality and everything to do with my criteria for liking other dogs, which I keep a closely guarded secret.

Then there's dog breeds.  Dachshunds are very popular at the moment, and French Poodle crosses are everywhere; it's surely only a matter of time before I meet a British Bull Dog Poo, but is this at the expense of some of our native breeds?  The Lancashire Heeler from up the road looks a bit lonely as one of the countries endangered breeds, and although I live in the county, I haven't met many Sussex Spaniels recently.  I'm sure they're equally as nice as dog breeds from Europe.  It's difficult, if you'll excuse the obvious pun, to make head or tail of the whole issue.

So I've decided to offer a home for the bewildered and form a third alternative.  How about the 'In, Out, Shake it All About' option? You can go to Europe for your holidays provided you also spend some time exploring the Lake District or Northumberland.  If you want to buy a foreign dog breed, it needs to come from British stock, and as for the dog shows, come on Demz, Lexi and Desmond, classy show Briard pals from Twitter, you can do it.  If not, I could always try for first in 'dog with the most appealing eyes' again; I'm a British breed, I was born in Hastings and the village show is coming up.  As regards rules and regualtions, European or otherwise, I sorted that one a long time ago: ignore the ones you don't like and only obey the ones that meet the universal 'what's in it for me' criteria.  Anway, to show I'm not partisan in either direction, I'll eat any cheese when it's dropped on the floor, Cheddar or Roquefort, and I'll drink Harveys or Peroni with equal relish if I get the chance. So how's that for a political compromise?

Vote for 'In, Out, Shake it all About' and you'll be barking too!


1 comment:

  1. Rolo you made perfect sense to me......I would vote for you. X Janice xx

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