Sunday 17 March 2013

Home Comforts

I know some dogs have the freedom to roam the whole house, but I'm largely confined to the kitchen. The only time I get to go upstairs is for winter baths.  I can't say I mind much as the kitchen is the best room to be in.  It's where the food lives and, perhaps more importantly, where 'Them Indoors' consume two out of their three daily meals.  I deploy myself tactically on those occasions.  'Junior Him' is a good bet when he's at home, because he tends to be a bit careless and stuff gets spilt.  I like to help with the clearing up.  'Her Indoors' is a lost cause.  Not only does she sternly disapprove of giving me treats (it's her that has to take me to the vets for my annual weigh-in) but she rarely spills anything herself, so her meals are not even worth getting out of bed for.  'Him Indoors' is very good at accidentally on purpose knocking food to the floor and directly giving me treats such as bits of cheese and pieces of carrot when 'Her Indoors' isn't looking.  I follow him around closely. 

I also sleep in the kitchen, next to the back door, which leads to the Lobby.  This is an interesting room full of dirty shoes, laundry, my leads, coat and toys, plus my food, which is carefully stored out of reach, in dog-proof metal containers - pity.  Anyway, next to the door is a good position to check visitors.  If I'm tired I can just roll over in my bed so that they can tickle my armpits on the way passed.  I do have to be careful of falling objects as my bed is next to the end of the worktops.  There's a key rack above my head so keys occasionally rain down which makes me a bit jumpy.  I once had a bouquets of flowers land on me, but that's another story.  There's also an open cupboard, with a curtain across the front, right next to my quarters, and there's the occasional avalanche when 'Them Indoors' put too much in it.  I vacate my bed rapidly at the slightest sound.  I've learnt from experienced.  Sometimes, when I'm reluctant to get out of bed for my nightly comfort break in the garden, 'Him Indoors' deliberately rattles things in the cupboard and watches me shoot out, with some amusement.  It's a low tactic and one he should be ashamed of.  Still, at least he gives me treats so I try to consider the wider picture.

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